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Not Yet in the DSM-IV

Another definition for USB: Unintentional Self-Injurious Behavior.

Mine:

1. I bite my lip while eating. I mean, it's not like I'm just learning how to eat, right? But I do this all the time. Then, of course, I continue to bite that same spot, over and over. Note: a couple weeks ago I sneezed and chomped down hard on the inside of my cheek. I spit out blood for ten minutes.

2. Stubbing my toe. I should not walk around barefoot at home. I've broken toes at least 10 times over the past couple decades.

3. I often open the car door and ram it into my shin. I never did this with my old car. This door is bigger. The corner is also very pointed. My car door hates me.

4. Scooching in a wheeled office chair at work and bashing my knee straight into the desk. Bashing the center of my knee, the most sensitive part. My face instantly goes numb from the pain.

5. I like to spill hot coffee on myself  (yanno, you pick up the cup and immediately slosh it over the rim). Wait, no--I don't really "like" it, but I do it so often you'd think I was doing this purely for pleasure. I especially do this at work, where the coffee is served nearly at boiling temperature.

So, what do YOU guys do?



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( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
sookie06
Feb. 13th, 2011 05:38 pm (UTC)
I bite my lip, too! I blame it on my buck teeth.

I hit my shin on open drawers.

I break my nails on door handles. Somehow.

I almost always burn myself when I take something out of the oven.

I always stub the same pinkie toe on one of the legs of our bed. Bad bed.
onegrapeshy
Feb. 13th, 2011 06:05 pm (UTC)
Oh, those burns are the worst!
courtneywrites
Feb. 13th, 2011 06:01 pm (UTC)
I have bruise on my upper right thigh from walking into the same post on my nephew's bed over and over and over again when I stayed there in January. It left a bruise scar! (This is to match the bruise I used to have on my left leg, when I would repeatedly walk into the bench at my best friend's old apartment.) I break my nails turning on the faucets at my parents' place. I often misjudge the entrance to my kitchen and bang into the door frame. I burn myself with my straightening iron. I could go on and on.

onegrapeshy
Feb. 13th, 2011 06:06 pm (UTC)
Between you and Sookie and your broken nails, I'm suddenly very glad I keep mine so short.
fandoria
Feb. 13th, 2011 09:18 pm (UTC)
I constantly bite my lips (and the inside of my cheeks) too. And once I bite them, I keep doing it over and over.

I also bump into door frames a lot. Elbows, arms, knees. Not fun. Oh, and I catch my shirts on the door latches all the time.
onegrapeshy
Feb. 13th, 2011 11:32 pm (UTC)
"Oh, and I catch my shirts on the door latches all the time."

OMG, I do that at work all the time. I've ruined uniforms doing that, totally ripped off the pockets.

What's with this lip-chomping? All of us seem to be doing it.
goldiebug
Feb. 14th, 2011 12:18 am (UTC)
notes from klutzdom
I do things like nearly knock myself out with the rear hatch of my car; in winter it rises up more slowly and because I'm wearing a hat or hood I can't see it in my peripheral vision and I straighten up BONK! right into it.

We have very hazardous pointy cornered drawers at work and all of us have bruises from them.

I also give myself paper cuts frequently. :-(
onegrapeshy
Feb. 14th, 2011 02:01 pm (UTC)
Re: notes from klutzdom
Re: the hatch and lack of peripheral vision--I'm not laughing. I swear.

*hiding face*

Really! :)
marirene74
Feb. 14th, 2011 12:35 am (UTC)
If there was ever any doubt we where related...
This confirmed it lol
onegrapeshy
Feb. 14th, 2011 02:02 pm (UTC)
Re: If there was ever any doubt we where related...
LOLOL!

Yep, two big old walking black-and-bluers!
Laura Conant Howard
Feb. 14th, 2011 02:19 am (UTC)
I bang my head on my VERY sharp cabinets... My cabinets hate me.
onegrapeshy
Feb. 14th, 2011 02:03 pm (UTC)
You'd think after the few 100 times, you'd wise up and not get bonked.

Why, WHY doesn't it work that way???
ophelialaughs
Feb. 15th, 2011 12:30 am (UTC)
My shins are black black and purple from where Kelly walks on them if I put my feet on the coffee table. You'd think I'd quit that, because it's really quite painful.
onegrapeshy
Feb. 15th, 2011 01:59 pm (UTC)
Uh...yeah! lol
edgyauthor
Feb. 15th, 2011 05:13 am (UTC)
YIKES!

As for me...if I have a canker sore, I will always somehow manage to bite it by accident. (Doesn't help that I tend to get 'em on my tongue anymore.) I will be unaware that automatic doors are automatic and get face-smacked by one. Also, I will sometimes get the tubing of my insulin pump caught on something, causing it to rip out of me, usually on the same day I changed the site. (If my luck is feeling especially cruel, I will start bleeding, or the tubing will get caught on something like a CD tower, making it CRASH!)

There's probably other things I do, but yeah: you're not alone when it comes to USB-ness. XD
onegrapeshy
Feb. 15th, 2011 02:01 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I've been door smacked a few times, lol. No experience with an insulin pump (yikes) -- but once, at work, I tripped over some tubing and yanking an NG tube right out of my poor patient's nose. :(
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )

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